I arrived in Australia in 2017 after fleeing family violence at 19 years old. Despite having meticulously planned my escape from the age of 15, I had little understanding of all that I had ran away from.
“Where I grew up, mental health was not spoken about, and any mention of mental illness was shoved under the rug.”
I held my façade for the most part, only breaking down in front of my mother for the first time at aged seventeen and another time in front of my teacher. I was simply told to get over it.
After getting the fresh start I had fought hard for in Australia, I remain plagued by the stigma I grew accustomed to and was too scared to seek help.
It was only until things reached a breaking point when I became the victim-survivor of an assault on my university campus and subsequently a witness in a widely publicised trial then re-trial that forced me to seek help.
I had only intended to speak about the assault, but it opened the floodgates to everything I had kept to myself until that moment. I was eventually diagnosed with complex PTSD, depression, and anxiety.
The diagnosis made me realise it was not (as I was so often told) just in my head and I began to build self-compassion. Over the next few years, I started to unpack of my trauma and rebuild my support networks.
“For me, a key part of my healing journey is being able to utilise my lived and living experiences to drive systemic reforms to allow better, more accessible supports for my communities. It has allowed me to reclaim parts of my story and find solidarity.”
It has taken a long time for me to build a chosen family for myself here and to re-learn how to place my trust in others to support me through the bad days. If you have met me or done a virtual meeting with me, you will probably have caught a glimpse of my black cat spike. Despite his daily antics, he has quickly become a strong emotional support for my mental health.
I turned 26 years old this year, an age I never saw myself living to let alone have people and a job I enjoy waking up for.
“I still get bad days and relapses, and that’s okay. It’s not a linear journey.”
LewChing is a batyr lived experience storyteller and an Embrace Multicultural Mental Health Lived Experience Group member.
Photos by Thorson Photography.
